Confronting Fears

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There exists within each of us certain fears that hang above our heads like black clouds, threatening to pour rain down upon us at any moment. The more we believe in these fears the larger they grow, until the threat spreads beyond our control; to other people who are passing by who cannot escape the rain when it pours. Some fears float out in front of us, looming in the distance, a storm cloud rolling in, while others fade into the blue skies behind us, and we’ve seen their demise.

Fear is a funny thing. No matter how often we confront our fears, it's like we instantly manage to find a new one. When the clouds clear up and the sun shines through, we find another cloud to take it’s place. And that is the human condition. It is the desire to find fear and face it that makes us unique. It is our undying affection for challenge and rebirth that makes us interesting.

We shelter ourselves with umbrellas and hats and rain coats so that we cannot feel the sting of the rain, but the rain is rarely as bad as one thinks it will be. It can be unpleasant and cold and lonely, but it lets you know you are alive. 

Just the same with fear: when we let it touch us, when we do not run away, it has no more power. The more we ignore it or shield ourselves from it, the larger it grows, an ever-present entity in your heart. But when it is unleashed, and we feel it’s full effects, we know it for what it is. We call it by name and look it in the face. We understand what our fear has to say, and we respond in kind. We laugh in the face of danger when we confront our fears.


That was the thought I had the other day that changed everything for me. I no longer felt bound by life’s rules. I simply wanted to be brave, to do something that scared me, and to face that thing head on. When we do something that takes courage, we diminish fear. It will never leave our side completely, for if it does we know we are complacent, unchanging, and stagnant. But that cloud will grow smaller, as I have watched mine for the last few years, until it is a friend, a companion, waiting to challenge you.

Don’t let your storm cloud grow so large it changes the lives of others.  And just as importantly, don’t let it cast a shadow over your life. Take control of it. Embrace it. Learn to see the good in it. And when you do, you might find that it has moved on without unleashing the storm you were expecting. Because when we love our fears, we make room for blue sky days.



My current fear: leaving home, properly, for the first time to go to India for the year.
Moment of bravery: saying goodbye to some of the people who've helped shape my life in ways they can barely imagine.


    GAHH Okay where do I even begin...
    Current fear: Failure. Fear of not succeeding. Fear of not living up to expectations.
    Moment of bravery: To be honest, I'm not doing anything about this fear. I'm 'letting the storm cloud grow to large' and I'm really scared. I don't even know where to begin...

    One more time I have to say, I LOVE THIS SO SO MUCH.
    Have fun in India by the way!!

    1. AHH EMILY THANK YOU THANK YOU <3 you have to believe in yourself, because honestly you're fabulous darling x thanks again!! :)

    2. Anne, this post is just amazing! Thank you so much for writing it. You somehow manage to say all the right words, & in ways that I never quite can. I swear your literary talents know no bounds! And as for your fears, with a beautiful attitude like yours, you know you're going to be just fine. Good luck with your move to India, hope it's everything you dreamed it would be & so much more :) xx

    3. Sorry I posted this in the wrong place haha!

    4. ahahaha that's okay!! THANK YOU SO SO MUCH Natasha!! *blushes* you're so amazing <3 xx

    5. AHH EMILY THANK YOU THANK YOU <3 you have to believe in yourself, because honestly you're fabulous darling x thanks again!! :)

  2. As always, this is so beautifully written Anne! Gosh seriously, I have a lot of love for you & your blog. Which might be weird because I actually don't really know you but what I certainly do know is that you're a wonderful person :) Personally I'm often afraid of the unknown - new situations, things I've never done before, talking to someone I've never talked to before. I'm working on getting better at this & ignoring that fear but the progress is pretty slow. I guess it's better than nothing though. My moment of bravery was doing my english presentation without getting nervous last week. I used to be so afraid of talking in front of people so this is a huge step for me x


    1. AWWWWWW <3 Sara I have so much love for you too, I'm lucky such a lovely, amazing person reads my blog and supports me like you do - i feel so blessed! I'm often afraid of that too- like having to call someone??? *runs away and hides* I'm sure your presentation was wonderful and I'm so proud of you <3

  3. I can't stress how convenient this post was for me to read today. Currently I am afraid of something quite silly, and that is my first date. This guy that I met a couple of times told me he would love to take me out on a date and since Tuesday night I have been dogging him. It is not because I don't trust him but I fear that he might not understand my anxiety around new situations and the fears of unknown. I don't even know if I am making sense, but I am so scared to put myself out there.
    Thank you for posting this, it is giving me courage to do something brave today. and I might just say yes to him today.
    gahhhhhh THis is so nerve racking.
    ps. Your writing is beyond beautiful!
    wishing you all the best,

    1. You know I completely relate to that fear, because I've been doing a similar thing and I know how hard it can be to let someone new in. Good luck Ayele!! X

    2. Hi Ayele,
      Everyone is nervous on their first date, and he will be too. My best advice is 1) Plan ahead. Think up at least a few topics that he/she might be interested in, in case the conversation runs out. Shy guys are prone to do that because they over think.
      2)Try to minimize cell phone use
      3) Go somewhere fun, not like a bar, but maybe bowling or something. It gives you something to do so there's not so much pressure on either of you.
      4) Kinda obvious, but dress above average. You don't want to go casual, but you don't want super fancy either. It'll show that the date means something to you.
      5) Be yourself. Cliche I know, but this is key. The point of a date is to get to know the other person. What's the point if you're just tricking the other person by pretending to be what you think they want?

      I hope maybe this helped, if you haven't gone on the date already...
      Wishing you the best love,
      Hugs from Hayley xx

  4. Hi Anne,
    As everyone else has stated, what a magnificent post! Your writing is so lovely and although I haven't been active lately (my life has been pretty crazy right now) reading your post always makes my day!
    My biggest fears right now are being buried alive, the dark, and never fitting in.

    This is my ninth move (most likely my last) and although I've been here for months I can't name 90% of the kids in my school and I've become more... shy? Which has never been a problem for me. I have a few groups I can hang out with but anyone I choose to hang with I third wheel. From previous experience I know I'll be okay but at the moment it's scary and frustrating.

    Also going to another country probably will be scary, especially India! What a drastic change! I'm sure once you get adjusted or at the very least settled wherever you're staying you will probably feel better. I've only moved within the states so I don't completely understand understand what you're going through but I'd recommend keeping a journal of your experience! Especially if it's only a year; you won't regret documenting everything!

    Thanks again for sharing,
    All the love
    Hugs from Hayley xx

  5. Hey hayley!! Thank you, thank you <3 nine moves must have been hard :( if it's any help I swear there was like half my year group (and my school was small & I was there for 6 years) whose names I didn't know. I used to change friend groups a lot too and it will be okay. Good luck with the rest of this year! I'm sure you'll do brilliantly!

    Thanks again, and yep, definitely planning to keep a journal and blog and take a lot of photos :D Xx


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